Splice

(2009) ***1/2

How I missed a beautiful work of art like Splice, I'll never know. Well, actually I do know -- this movie got bad reviews at the time and despite it's starring one of my favorite actors, the flawless Adrien Brody, I knew not a soul who would've wanted to spend their time and money watching this.

Not a soul but me.

I've got a soft spot for tall white guys with big noses.

The story focuses on Clive (Brody) and Elsa (Sarah Polley), two genetic engineers in love and on the verge of presenting a new creation to the public that could help end human diseases from synthesizing a gene possessed in their specimens (which really look like human flesh-colored sea slugs). Eventually they add a pinch of human DNA into the mix to see what happens.

Dren happens -- an adorable pig-rat-fish thing that subsists on sugar and Elsa's coos of encouragement.

Julie and Octo did a superb job of summarizing this back in oh-ten, and I pretty much agree with a lot of what they said. A few troubles I had with the movie were with Elsa -- it's her damn duty as a scientist to create, clone, kill and autopsy animals everyday to get what she wants. How'd she get her damn doctorate? Woman must've killed a thousand mice, tested over a hundred beagles and primates to get her Ph. D. and she can't stand to terminate "Dren" in the name of science!

Such marvelous things nerds are made of. Courtesy of laughingsquid.com

Anyway, the dynamic couple make one bad decision after another and as Dren matures the movie becomes both intriguing, saddening, and creepy. It's intriguing to me that Elsa doesn't want to have a child of her own with Clive but is quite comfortable with creating one in the lab (I guess because it doesn't compromise her body and career?), saddening because despite their best efforts to "parent" Dren, she is still reared in seclusion and secrecy and only wants to go out and explore the world. Take her to a late-night movie, or on a Sunday drive in the countryside, or include her in a big brunch of bacon 'n' eggs -- this specimen is cognizant and needs meaningful experiences!

There's one scene that I thought the movie could do without, but later realized was necessary in order for the ending to have the same impact. Either way, if you want some messed up, unethical scientific practices, Splice delivers!