Horrors of Spider Island

(1962) **1/2

A band of showgirls are on their way to Singapore when their plane catches fire and lands in the sea. The vulnerable young women are stranded, and their only source of common sense and direction come from their show director, Gary, as they struggle to survive on a nearby island.

Life on the island isn't all naked fun and games, as they soon find out -- the girls and Gary happen upon a cabin where giant spiders have killed a man and hung them up in their web. Not one day after finding the Corpse Hung in the Web (the original German-Yugoslav title in 1960), Gary himself gets bitten on a night stroll and begins a metamorphosis into a spidery-man.

The girls continue on without Gary, but drama heightens as a food grows scarce -- these simple but beautiful girls only know how to eat out of cans, go figure -- but luckily for them, the man who died in the giant spider web was a professor and his two young male research partners arrive and promise them some temporary love and a guaranteed boat ride back to civilization. Everything a girl could want, right?

There were a couple of humorous things about this movie that I'd like to note here: firstly, the way in which the women "auditioned" for the Singapore show in the beginning of the movie.
Mr. Webster -- Hmm, legs?
Showgirl -- Pardon me?
Secretary -- Mr. Webster would like to look at your legs.
Showgirl -- Oh yes, of course! [lifts up skirt]
Mr. Webster -- [crosses legs]
Secretary -- Alright, you're hired.

Why can't all interviews be that simple to navigate?

The second thing was the big-band, swing-style music that created an atmosphere not of urgency, but of gaiety. During a high-stakes chase through the island I really thought the characters were going to break out into song and dance to uplift morale. It never happened and I think the movie would have felt more complete if it did have a cheesy song/dance routine incorporated. Any musical horror movies out there, fellow Thonners?

Use those fine legs for something productive!